A very expensive love affair

The other day I went shopping with my mom (Chi, wyak thoo) and we ended up going to jewellery shops. There was this one particular shop we went to,  the owner  is such an excellent salesman that he convinced me to buy stuff I would not have even considered. 

And the more I tried on stuff, the more I fell in love with the idea of wearing jewellery. I have hardly ever worn jewelry and don't think I will ever be a regular wearer of bling. Mostly because I can't be bothered and also because jewelry digs into mys skin.

But that day I was liking loving all the pieces I looked at. Maybe I was caught up in the beauty of it all. And maybe because I realised that jewellery ( when I wore the kind I liked) suited me. 

And now I actually own jewellery. (Even though I don't even know if I 'll ever wear them!) 

Though I am still not sure if I want this love story to last. 

How to not panic when you lose your data on your device

So last week I lost a lot of data on my pendrive which I use as a back up. My first reaction was to panic. 

Wouldn't anyone ?!

After 10 minutes of whining and trying to pull my hair off I googled my problems and came up with a few solutions.

Recovery software

One common thing that every article online suggested is using Recovery software and believe me you're spoiled for choice. Some of them will only let you view the data unless you buy it but many like Recuva and zar are pretty good free software. I tried quite a few but these worked. Recuva recovered files and images I had deleted way back in 2010-11. Unfortunately for me, the files I wanted could not be viewed even after recovery

Overwritten files will not be valid after recovery

That's what the saddest part was. While recovery softwares do work, all files may not be recovered. It's 50-50 chance. I didn't get back the files I desperatley wanted. Apparently, they had been over-written. 

Back up, back up and more back up

I for one thing beleive that we rely on technology too much and forget that they're machines and anything can go wrong! I used only my pendrive as back up. It wasn't even secure! Ideally I should have had more back up. So you should have 2-3 back up options for your important files. And that's where comes cloud storage

Cloud networks

Cloud computing is not a new concept but cloud storage is. These days cloud networks like dropbox and google drive are available and one can easily back up files. It's as easy as registering and you have unlimited space. Well, dropbox initially gives you limited space and you have to
 upgrade/recommend to get more space which is annoying. Google drive gives you loads of space and if you have a google account (which they make sure we invariably do!) you can just log in from your account and access your drive.  It's a relatively new feature but I wish I had done it when I came to know about it. 

Emails

If you feel that storing all your files on a cloud network is too invasive (which I feel it is, even though it's very convenient.) you can email your docs and pics to yourself. It is ofcourse more time consuming than just dropping all your files on a drive but is a little more private than the clouds. Plus an extra back up option. After the catastrophe I feel one can't have enough back up!. 

One more thing I learned while trying to find out why my files got deleted was- Free anti virus does not give you full protection!

Believe it or not, you do need more protection.  Even safe sites can bring viruses. So invest some money and pay for an anti-virus! I had always downloaded anti virus after my authentic paid for one ended. Which apparently was a big big mistake. So now I actually bought anti virus. I am not taking any chances! (Yes, I am pretty paranoid. )

 So  what would you have done if you lost your data? And what back up options do you use? 

Random shit about a random sleepy day

 You know those days where you feel you've been drugged and sleep all day? I had one of them today. I had a oral driving test today and I randomly went without much of a glance at the shit I had to study. For the first time in my existance I was not nervous before an exam. And I woke up as late as 9. The oral got over in 10 mins. I kept back home and promptly went to sleep. I got up for lunch and went back to bed again. Only woke up at 5, feeling slightly better. 

So anyway, I will learning to drive in a few days. I was sort of freaking out earlier but now I am excited. I will finally learn how to drive. I so hope I don't suck at it.

So that's about it. Random shit about a random day. 

The first step: A guest post by Amateur at this

Hey! This month I have another guest on Pigeonheadophobia. Satyabati, also known as Amateur at this in the blogging world is a very dear friend of mine. We go back a long way. We were school friends, lost touch and then reconnected around two years ago. Satyabati, though a Calcuttan at heart is currently based in Hyderabad where she is doing her masters in English. She is also a talented freelance content writer. And now that introductions are done I am handing my blog over to her. 

The First Step

I had relocated to Hyderabad in pursuit of higher education (and happiness, I might add) from my hometown Kolkata in 2012. So when my friend asked me to write a guest post for her blog, I thought I’d write something about my first encounter with reality outside home.

I’m a residential student of my university, meaning I live on campus. Of course, that the move brought a tremendous change in my life cannot be enough emphasized. It has been more than a year and a half since I first came to Hyderabad, yet at times I am still left grappling with the challenges of living alone.

Loneliness. This was the first emotion I could identify amongst the squiggling bundle of nerves that I had become in my initial days. I had never lived a day on my own in my entire 21 year old life. I wasn’t exactly nervous, but there was a constant jittery feeling in my head.

Certain things took time to get used to, like the fact that I have to go eat my meals on my own responsibility. If I went hungry, nobody would give a rat’s gut about it. Then came the usual washing, cleaning, and the occasional cooking.

In my undergraduate days, all my friends spoke the same language. And I mean that very literally. But in my university, I suddenly met numerous fellow students from various linguistic backgrounds. I feel that if I had not come here, in this multi-lingual environment, I would never have fully appreciated how important English is, to me and as a common communicative language.

Kolkata is the city that saw nearly all of my firsts. But Hyderabad has in a way become my rite to passage into adulthood. I went to my first nightclub here. I had never been able to cook anything before, so Hyderabad has had the pleasure of my first khichdi; my first chocolate-bomb on Diwali, my first DJ-Night, my first binge drinking and passing out, my first haggle with the sabzi-wala, my first getting lost in the city without a dime in my pocket...

Hyderabad isn’t home. I don’t think it’ll ever be. But yes, it is special. It is special how it rains here. It is special to look at the entire city awakening as the sun goes down from the top of Maula-Ali. It is special because, even with all the difference in language, food and culture, it gave a scared girl in self denial hope, that it will be alright. All you need to do is take the first step.

Dropping your smartphone too many times is hazardous to health

So my phone conked off today. And I realised that the phrase-" I can't live without my phone" applies to me too! I depend on my phone, a lot. For people so used to smartphones and internet access on their fingertips, living without a phone for a day or two is next to impossible. I am trying and trying but it's increasingly difficult.

Day 1

5.15 am. The reason I can wake up at 6 am is my multiple alarms. One at 5.15, one at 5.40 and another at 6. I will have to set multiple alarms on the feature phone I am using. I guess this is not a major problem

6.30 am. I track my exercising routine on my Endomondo app. No phone, no app.

I don't wear a watch and use my phone to see the time.


7. am I check my whatsapp. Send a quick hi to A. That can't be done today.
9. am I want to make a note of something on my phone memo but I cant.
9.30 am. A quick google search to verify news about Nelson Mandela's death is also not possible. I have to wait till I switch on my laptop, but then I will be caught up with work.

10. am One of my friends is very ill, I want to be updated about his condition. And all my numbers are saved on my phone. So now I can't contact anyone. I am worrying about him.

11 am. I  give a status about it, asking for help. I also do a google search. Many threads have suggestions but none of them work.

12. 15 pm I give up on my phone. It's sort of liberating.

1pm. Mom wants to whatsapp me but can't. No phone checking, no notifications.

2 pm.Someone wanted to talk to me and had to call my mom. I run a business and can't afford to be un-contactable.

3 pm. I am wondering how to contact people I urgently need to . I try reviving my phone again. It doesn't work.

5.20 pm. I find a spare set and put my sim in.

9. pm I want to do a quick search for a recipe but well I cant! This is really difficult!

11.pm, No phone, no music. 

Day 2

10 am. Gave my phone for repairs.
7pm Repair guy says he wasn't able to do anything. (Is it time for a new phone?)

Day 3

Zilch. 

Day 4.

Gave my phone for repairs at a different place. Using a Nokia feature phone. My first phone.  It's been little less than 2 years but I am so used a smartphone, that I am feeling lost without it. I so want a smartphone(mine or a new one) within this week. I am not some vagrant or sanyasi!

*fingers crossed*

Note to self: Not to be forgotten.

I read something today. It has inspired me to lead life on my own terms.  It was a list of 25 things you don't need to justify to others. Many times we feel the need to justify our life to others. But do you really need to? It was a wake up call. I need to be happy. And therefore I need to do stuff that makes me happy.

Unless I take a step towards my dream it won't get fulfilled on it's own. I can't sit around waiting for it to happen.

So there. Lesson learnt. I hope I don't forget it. Someone please keep reminding me. I am forgetful. 

T:Today there is a change...

Today I ran down the stairs. I was not as fast as other people are but I did. It felt good.  I am going to run  down again  tomorrow. And the day after. And after that. 

It’s an everyday thing . Running down stairs. But I can’t. It’s not as if I have faulty limbs. Some of you know this already. I am scared of running down stairs. It’s a phobia. I am not exaggerating.  Whenever I have to run down stairs I get nervous and really scared. An uneasiness sets in.I can’t explain it. My feet refuse to listen to me. I just can’t run down. If I am in a hurry I hop. I never run. I have tried, before. And failed. I always end up hopping.

But today, I tried. And succeeded. Because I finally decided that I want to get over my phobia. Today I wanted to do something unexpected.  Actually, it’s not just about today. I want to stop doing what is expected. I don’t remember when I started doing that. I was never the sort to care about what others thought of me.  But now I do. I need to stop caring about people’s opinions once again. What others think of me is none of my business.

“The best of us must sometimes eat our words” Albus Dumbledore had once said. I am not the best but I think I have to eat my words. Which is okay. Who said that I can’t change my opinions? Who said I have to remain the same? I was scared of changing. Scared of eating my words. Because I had gotten scared of being judged. No more.

I want to run down stairs without feeling scared. Anyway, I  bang myself here and there ; every now and then and  trip over stuff on a regular basis. Why am I scared of falling then? What’s the utmost that will happen? I will fall and hurt myself and get a bruise or two. 

 I don’t want to be scared anymore. That’s  why I will run down the stairs everyday. And increase my speed, gradually. Until I can run as fast as everyone else can.

Faith

I am a Hindu because I was born in a Hindu family. Being a Hindu is of no consequence to me. Believing in God is. My faith does not depend on rituals.

Around a year back I had gone to the Kali temple in Kalighat, with Kaniti.  It was my first visit. We went there to buy a pair of shakha, pola(bangles that married Bengali woman wear) for my bhabhi. And it is an experience I am not likely to forget. For all the wrong reasons. We were buying stuff outside the temple when we decided to visit the Goddess inside.

There were more than several pundits trying to lure people in. One of the pundits told us that he will help us offer Puja for Rs 22. We decided to go with him. He made us buy some stuff. Flowers, sindoor, a red cloth, red thread, some bangles and prasad. And then he took us to a place we could keep our shoes. We took off us shoes and followed him. He took us for a darshan through the “V.I.P” entrance so that we young girls could avoid the crowd. We saw the idol and then he took us to another room where we could offer our puja.
He made us sit separately because we are not of the same caste(Kaniti is a Brahmin which I am not) All my life I have never been asked my caste as if it’s such an important thing. That was the first time.

We sat for a while and he called us in turns so that we could perform puja. And then the something we were not expecting happened. He asked for 1500 bucks. He said it’s an offering to Kali. I was shocked. I told him I didn’t have the money and that he had said the puja could be done in only 22 rupees. He said that was for the things we had bought. Both Kaniti and I were shocked. He kept on arguing with us and at one point turned nasty. For a moment I was really scared.

I explained to him that we had no money and offered a Rs.50 note. He looked offended and then said we could come back to the temple and give money when our wishes came true. We nodded in agreement and went outside.

When we went to the place our shoes were kept, we were in for another not-so-pleasant-surprise. The pundit asked for his service fee. I don’t remember how much we paid him but I think it was around 100 bucks.  After that I just about had enough money to go back home.

As soon as I got on the bus I rubbed of the red “tikka” from my forehead. I was feeling so sickened. As soon as I reached home I recalled the story to my Mom. I was so disgusted I tore off the red thread from my hand and went for a shower.

Religion is made ugly by such people. To them it’s just business. A money making scheme. I would rather to stay away from anything which holds no meaning for me. And certainly not something that involves mixing worship with money. The pundit was trying to fleece us in the name of God. We, as educated young girls were feeling victimized. And I don’t ever want to feel that way when it comes to my faith in god. My faith remains unshaken and my stance against  rituals is stronger now.

100 Words: Don't mention fear

It's hard to admit that I don't have the answers.  I had figured out what I want . But confused about how to go about it. I don't want to be.  

I am scared. I don't like not knowing where I stand. It's my biggest fear. 

I hate being vulnerable. Being insecure.

I think I will listen to one of my favourite songs.

"Heart, don't fail me now!

Courage, don't desert me!

Don't turn back now that we're here.."

Those are the words I need.

I will be brave. I won’t let anything take away my dreams. Not even me. 

Doing what is right

I am all for justice and individual rights and feel elated when I read stories about the "wronged who are triumphant after the justice tug of war." One feels empathy for the underdog because one thinks that one may be in the same situation at some point of time. Its human tendency to feel for the minority, the needy and all kind of victoms. Even if we do nothing to help and forget about it all in five minutes! But once in a while( maybe blue moon, maybe decade) something pulls tightly at the safely hidden strings of our heart and we actually take some action and help someone out. We may donate blood, we may take part in a rally, we may make a poster; whatever we can do, we do.



Yes, that happened to me once-I really felt something, an urge to help. If anyone remembers, in 2007 there was this poor guy who loved a rich girl whose rich dad was against the match and the guy died? It was big news in West bengal, stories about it were filed for more than a month. A candlelight vigil, a protest march and a petition was held to get justice for the guy- a CBI investigation to be precise. I was one of the protestors.

Taking part in something like this brought in a few changes.
1. It made me more confident.I learned how to talk to perfect strangers.

2. I learned that if I believe in something, reallly believe in something, I am as confident as can be and can convince others too!

3. I realised that change can happen, that "we" are the change, the aam junta has power to change however sceptical people are.

4. I learned to light candles and got over my fear of getting burned something i had developed ever since i had got burned badly when I was 9

5. But best of all it inspired me to "do" other things in future and reinstalled my belief in justice

If helping someone has helped me so much then I am all for helping people, justice and individual rights!