Tuesday, June 28, 2011

You've come a long way, Kid! Part 2

My natural instinct is to be over-sensitive, moody and reserved.

I however realized that these characteristics could end up becoming my Hamartia- my fatal flaw. So I needed to change that. I started to de-sensitize myself. Every small thing needn’t hurt me. I started letting go of my grudges. And since I was confident about my abilities now, I stopped caring about what other people thought of me, my actions, my words. Yes, I did and still do care about what my friends and family think about, but that’s about it.
I am still moody but I have learned to control my moods to a certain extent. I still get cranky when I am hungry.

And about being reserved? I am still a reserved person at heart but somehow people have a different image. I am friendly, I talk to people. Smile, sing, laugh, joke around, act crazy. Who would say I am reserved?  Not that I am faking all this. All the jokes, the fun is part of me. But I do have a quieter part. Only a handful of people have gotten past the surface and seen my serious side. My shy side. I don’t wear my emotions on my sleeve. ( except when I write, that is)

I sometimes wonder if I can become the quiet girl again. I don’t think I can, even if I wanted to. Whenever I am a bit quiet my friends think something is wrong. Not many people like silences. But its true that I talk more now and cant go back to being the person I was. I used be able to stay quiet for hours. Not anymore.

I can now move on. Let go. Accept changes. Let things run its course. Or just let them be.

I believe a lot in destiny. I was destined to write. But if I sit tight, don’t do anything about it, don’t write. Then it’s my fault. Yeah its my destiny, but it is to some extent in my hands. I believe in the stars and everything. But I also believe in hard work. in making things happen.

Sixteen year old me wouldn’t have imagined such wonderful things happening to her. I did turn out to be OKAY. The future seems bright and atlast I can swim!


  1. Anonymous29 June, 2011

    "Smile, sing, laugh, joke around, act crazy"
    i can relate to this..n especially to the 'sing' part :D
    you are no longer shy or reserved. people say i talk a lot..bt they dont know wen we are talking, whose doing all the talking :) :)
    this is the new you. this is the better you.

  2. ya we do talk a lot! dont we!

    even i luv the new me!

  3. and a 21 year you would never imagine what you would be when you are 25 or say 30...people tend to change with time,with environment.its quite but natural.just go on and enjoy the life..its worth laughing,singing,smiling :)
    loved your genuine thoughts and thanks for stopping by my blog and rendering your comment.

  4. @ what u said is quite true
    And your welcome. thnks for your comment too!

    And hey your a Cancerian too!