Thursday, October 4, 2012

T:Today there is a change...




Today I ran down the stairs. I was not as fast as other people are but I did. It felt good.  I am going to run  down again  tomorrow. And the day after. And after that. 

It’s an everyday thing . Running down stairs. But I can’t. It’s not as if I have faulty limbs. Some of you know this already. I am scared of running down stairs. It’s a phobia. I am not exaggerating.  Whenever I have to run down stairs I get nervous and really scared. An uneasiness sets in.I can’t explain it. My feet refuse to listen to me. I just can’t run down. If I am in a hurry I hop. I never run. I have tried, before. And failed. I always end up hopping.

But today, I tried. And succeeded. Because I finally decided that I want to get over my phobia. Today I wanted to do something unexpected.  Actually, it’s not just about today. I want to stop doing what is expected. I don’t remember when I started doing that. I was never the sort to care about what others thought of me.  But now I do. I need to stop caring about people’s opinions once again. What others think of me is none of my business.

“The best of us must sometimes eat our words” Albus Dumbledore had once said. I am not the best but I think I have to eat my words. Which is okay. Who said that I can’t change my opinions? Who said I have to remain the same? I was scared of changing. Scared of eating my words. Because I had gotten scared of being judged. No more.

I want to run down stairs without feeling scared. Anyway, I  bang myself here and there ; every now and then and  trip over stuff on a regular basis. Why am I scared of falling then? What’s the utmost that will happen? I will fall and hurt myself and get a bruise or two. 

 I don’t want to be scared anymore. That’s  why I will run down the stairs everyday. And increase my speed, gradually. Until I can run as fast as everyone else can.

4 comments :

  1. Sometimes we forget that change is not always bad. :)

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    1. Yes. We do forget. Specially people like me...

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  2. Running down stairs phobia?? Damn! I wish I knew that before! Every time I wanted to beat you at toe-fighting, I would have run down the stairs and you wouldn't have followed...

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    1. Well, it is a recent phobia:(
      I am trying to get over it...

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