Saturday, September 22, 2012

I: It is not that tough

It’s the weekend and I have a lot to do.  Journals to complete, pending work to be done. And I am feeling lazy about it all. Such a long week and such a short weekend.
In the hostel we can’t fully enjoy the luxury of not having to wake up early for class. If we don’t want to be cribbing of hunger, we need to wake up and keep breakfast for ourselves. What I usually do is, get up at 8; keep breakfast; brush my teeth and then sleep for another hour or so. It’s luxury, interrupted.

My roommate Tallu is up early on a Saturday, for the first time. She has to go to her piano class; which was rescheduled. It was my duty to wake her up at eight. I attempted. Let’s just say that her bed loves her too much; it doesn’t want to let go.

I am sitting on my bed; trying to decide what time I should start working. To post this I will have to go to the common room and connect a wire to my laptop; only then will I get access to the net. My bottle of water is empty. I will get up soon to fill it; again in the common room. And now I have finished my breakfast and I have to wash my plate.  I have to go to the common room. It’s inevitable.

Even though we crib about it, it’s convenient. The hostel, that is. No travelling, three meals a day. And compared to the other accommodation  options it’s pretty reasonable.  I can live with that. It has been four months, already. Next month we have exams. When I gave my C.U finals in April I had assumed that those were the last exams I was going to give, ever. Look at me now, giving exams again. Life can’t be predicted, can it?

In April next year, I will be leaving for home again. It seems a long way off now, but it isn’t really. Before I will know it, it will be April. I wonder who  I will miss. I wonder WHAT I will miss.

It’s almost the end of the year too. One more week of September and then October. The festive season. If I was in Calcutta, I would have been gearing up for Puja. My friends would have been telling me what new clothes they have bought. Lanes would have been partially blocked as labourers constructed elaborate pandals. Right after Durga Puja, Diwali arrives. This year, both are late.

It’s not yet the end of the year and I am reflecting on how 2012 flew by. April 2012 and September 2012 don’t seem like months apart, they seem like years apart. Was it this year that I gave my exams? Was  it only this year that I graduated? It seems like long ago. August seems long ago while December seems so close by. Why is that?

I have decided not to worry about the future anymore. It’s not worth it. Late realisation, I know. But better late than never, they say. One day at a time. I will keep reminding that to myself.  Taking this challenge helps. One letter at a time and I will get there. I know I will.  


  1. Did you know what you were going to miss when you left Kolkata?

    1. No, I Didn't. I didn't think I would miss it. Did you?

  2. I dont have anything specific to say about this post, but I just loved it, and I can't even tell why. Maybe it was the flow of it all, or just that it came straight from the most important corner of your heart. Keep this up...